18 July, 2005
shellshock

the image that fits is this one:

the day after a tornado strikes, or a hurricane makes landfall... without fail, the sun is always at its most brilliant, the sky at it's most cerulean. people stumbling unsteadily about, without memory or else overcome. landscape, flattened... scraps scattered in awkward heaps, bare foundations without walls, trees snapped at groung level.

by this time last night, i thought i'd be living in the woods, and the farce would be over. the mental separation had begun.

today, the silent treatment, which precedes the onslaught of Amnesia of recent events.

gimme alla your manic/depressive, passive/aggressive brain-fuckin' lovin'. booyah.
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so, yeah... all that.

peculiar sensations:
like, sitting on the tailgate of the truck, waiting for the potatoes to grill... and this little adolescent catbird who's been checking me out in the branches above my head, and landing feet away in the yard on a Worm Hunt, decides he needs a better look: six inches away from my thigh, on the edge of the fender. he sat there for about a full minute, breathing normally, sizing me up with those beady little black eyes, no doubt checking the RayBans. and then, gone.

and this one:
...when i finally decided to put my sweaters away for the summer(can't see 'em in the closet, don't think about them), i grabbed a stack from the shelf, stepped back with my left foot... and could have sworn that i'd stepped on a tiny icecube. i mean, it was that sharp, direct, wet/cold feeling, but when i rubbed my hand across the carpet, it was completely dry. and warm.

i think my foot had a stroke.

.